I meant to write this several weeks ago on Caroline's 22nd birthday when I actually compiled the list in my planner at work but didn't for reasons that don't matter.
But. Here they are. Top Ten Reasons I love Caroline Wallace.
1. She dresses me.
Those of you who know me know that shopping is one of my least favorite activities. Also buying clothes that are not black, green, brown, or tshirts with Star Wars characters on them is not high on the things I like list. But luckily I have a fashion designer as a bff. For weddings, galas, nice dinners, or being able to walk outside in New York without looking like a weird high school boy--I have Caroline to make sure I am appropriately (and oh so stylishly) dressed.
2. She feeds me.
Those of you who know me also know that if not watched carefully I will usually go obscene amounts of hours and sometimes days without eating or calling coffee lunch and cheese and crackers dinner. It's not that I do it on purpose, it's just I get lazy or I forget or really cheese and crackers aren't a meal? Regardless, I need to be reminded sometimes. Caroline is a lovely cook, her guacamole is magical, and she bought me a Jamba Juice gift card for Christmas to ensure at least my lunches had some nutrition in them. She also watches to make sure my dairy consumption isn't too excessive--you know with the whole lactose intolerance thing.
3. She has excellent taste in movies.
Someone once asked me if I had ever or would ever date someone purely for their movie selection. Well, no, at least, I don't think so--but I am fairly certain the basis of our friendship began with our similar taste in movies. There was a time when we were known at Blockbuster being that we were in there every weekend...sometimes twice. Our friendship has since grown and developed to be about more than just our shared affection for Joseph Gordon-Levitt and obsession with Martin Scorsese's soundtrack choices, but we can always count on a good conversation about the new Judd Apatow movie or the brilliance that is Inception.
4. We match.
I know this sounds like a silly reason but we both have blonde hair and blue eyes and symmetry is important in my life. And we really do have more fun.
5. She pioneers new vocabulary.
Bitchass, harting, spoonination celebration, likadasauce, pillow of majesty, da poots--just a few of the creative and catchy words or phrases to come out of Caroline's mouth over the years.
6. The time she dropped the F-bomb in the Mom Van in the middle of my street.
This is really just more of a fun instance that occurred when I was a sophomore and she was a junior in high school. We were younger then--a simpler time. Anyway we were trying to make a u-turn in my street or maybe just backing up or....you know, I don't clearly remember. Regardless I think she hit something, the curb? A tree? A squirrel? My car? Did she hit something at all? Maybe she reversed instead of going forward? Whatever! The point is she was frustrated and surprised and out of nowhere came the one word we as children had been warned against ever uttering outloud. It was fast, it was short, it was loud, and we both sat there with shocked wide-eyes--which is a trick for Caroline cause hers are already so big (and bea-u-ti-ful!). It was hilarious and we both ended up cracking up a minute after the initial shock wore off. I may have also promised never to tell this story again--oh well it's one of the reasons I love her.
7. She puts up with my obsessive Friends quoting.
I quote Friends...a lot. She is still my friend. Nough said.
8. She is more driven then the majority of our generation.
When Caroline was a senior in high school she decided she wanted to be a fashion designer and go to school in New York City. She applied to Parsons but applied to the program that focused more on the academic aspect--she figured she would have a better chance of getting in if her academics were weighed more than her artistic ability (to which I say...oh silly art master Caroline). We waited and waited and hadn't heard anything--she began resigning herself to attend SCAD (which I simply could not abide by as it is in Georgia and therefore many more miles away from me). Then one day the fateful letter arrived and not only had Caroline gotten in to Parsons for fashion design but it was the program that she didn't think she could get into (but obviously could)! She has since graduated, ending her four years at the same school where Project Runway was once filmed with a gorgeous thesis line for children called Hippies and Housewives. It's lovely, if you're friends with her on facebook go look at the pictures. She now works at the children's designer she interned for while still in school and has recently told me she might want to go to grad school for fashion history. Museum consultant perhaps? She's stepping out and taking no prisoners--look out New York she's not moving to Gettysburg any time soon.
9. She has never been anything but there.
Caroline has seen me through...everything. She swipes me for the subway, she buys me cat shirts, she makes me tell her what's wrong when I'm upset, she has on multiple occasions shown up in the middle of the night when I needed her. She makes me laugh, she lets me cry (I mean, she would if I ever did, scoff), she was Mark's only friend in high school. She can eat a whole pint of Ben and Jerry's in one sitting, she taught me how to snowboard--which really meant she brought to the top of a mountain and said okay go--I made it down like an hour and a half later. She eats her Chipotle burritos with a fork. She's amazing.
10. She's my wife.
Matt: K, bye buddy!
Melissa: Was that Michaela?
Matt: No, Maureen.
Caroline: You call Maureen "buddy"?
Matt: Yeah, what do you call your wife?
Caroline:...Melissa.
Happy belated birthday wife!
